Love & Relationships | 5 Key Components | Demelza in wonderland

I know as a medical student I should probably be glued to the BMJ or the Lancet ? proper medical journals about proper medical stuff ? and while I do of course find them interesting, if truth be told, I am totally hooked on women?s magazines, Glamour or Cosmo being the glossy of choice. Now, I don?t care at all for celeb gossip (I?d rather read the BMJ ) but what I love is real life issues, in particular, love and relationships. Whatever my status, I am hooked on what they have to say.

Reaching the ripe old age of 19 years and 10 months, I think that through reading countless issues of magazines, seeing my friend?s relationships and being in them for myself, I have learnt a lot. I don?t claim to be an expert, but I think I have figured out the basics of what I not only need, but deserve.

1. The Big Things -?This covers the issues that are most important to you. For example, the homeless and the vulnerable are a big concern to me, so when my boyfriend suggested we pop to a coffee shop and buy some tea for 3 homeless men we saw, I fell in love just a little bit more. Not only did I realise we were on the same page, I also saw more of his generous side.

2. The Little Things -?However small, however petty, the small things do?matter. When someone goes out of their way to do something because they know it makes you happy, it brings so much to the relationship. My boyfriend never used to put kisses at the end of texts to anyone, but because he knows I like it, he makes sure to send me a few. It?s cute that he noticed what makes me happy and acted accordingly.

3. Morals & Values -?These are important on a practical basis. You don?t want to go out with someone who won?t have sex before marriage if the physical element is crucial to how you are in a relationship. Can you cope with the differences and therefore inevitable arguments and debates?

4. Likes & Dislikes -?I?m not talking food, music or even films. I just wouldn?t want to be with someone whose interests were the polar opposite of mine, for example I am not nor will ever be a hiker. Therefore, dating a guy who lives for spending every weekend halfway up a mountain is clearly not for me. If I subject my boyfriend to girly films or the theatre, then he?ll choose the film/activity next time.

5. Knowing Me, Knowing You -?One of the most lovely things about a relationship is the little titbits of information you accumulate about each other ? their Starbucks order, favourite food, favourite colour? I so enjoy buying small presents or doing sweet things that I know for a fact he will love. Similarly, I like that he knows my favourite flower (peony), and goes out of his way to present me with one every so often.

So that?s my brief two-cents. I?m sure that as my relationship goes on (9 and a half months and counting!) I?ll have a lot more to say on my favourite subject. For now, I?ll leave you with my 5 main points to consider, and pass you over to my friend Stacey, who wrote a really good blog on this subject. You can read it here.

Love (and lots of it!), Demelza x

Source: http://demelzainwonderland.wordpress.com/2012/09/06/love-relationships-5-key-components/

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