Sunday, November 25, 2012

On Webisodes, Mars, The Mayan Apocalypse, Baby Boomers & More!

Remember a few weeks ago (okay, I guess it was more like last month) when I wrote about how I rolled sound and assisted Maryn in producing a webisode about the Blackout Haunted House? Remember? Huh? Huh? Remember when it was running in Los Angeles? Of course you don?t, because you most likely skip all my weekend posts since they?re boring and formulaic. Well, just in case you were wondering where the video went, here it is. Hear how great that sound sounds? That was me! I recorded that sound! Too bad they cut my on-camera interview about how scary/cool the haunted house was. I really thought that might have been my big Hollywood break. Now I?ll never be a movie star!

WIRED Science ran an article this week called, ?Thanksgiving on Mars: What astronauts will feast on in 2030.? Unfortunately, their predictions will not shock and amaze you. ?Snap beans, veggie loaf, stuffing, mashed sweet and white potatoes, pinto bean pie? are the amazing future foods that will be available for a Thanksgiving in outer space. I was hoping NASA would ? over the course of the next eighteen years ? have enough time to create brand new foods that we?ve never even heard of before. That?d make for an interesting Thanksgiving, right? What if we could eat Martian instead of turkey? We?re almost two decades away from the first Thanksgiving on Mars. Surely we should have enough time to find some form of life on the red planet that is also edible and non-poisonous. That would make Thanksgiving on Mars so much more like Thanksgiving on Earth. Here we celebrate displacing and destroying the Native Americans and their culture. On Mars we can just eat tiny microorganisms (or bigger, normal-sized aliens if they can be discovered) and we?ll be reveling in our superiority over another culture yet again! Why aim for pinto bean pie, guys? LET?S EAT SOME FUCKING ALIENS. [story]

Scientists have discovered a gene ?that predicts what time of day we?ll die.? If mine isn?t late at night or really early in the morning, I?m going to be pissed. Those are the two most-likely times I will be engaged in a beautifully disgusting sex act, and if that?s NOT how I?m supposed to die than FUCK YOU, SCIENCE. [story]

Did you know that ?Baby Boomer health trends? exist? CNN and their endless coverage of all things Baby Boomers posted a blog about the top five trends in Baby Boomer health this week. Let me tell you?these trends are startling. First, there?s ?Boomeritis.? It?s like senioritis, but with old people?s bodies. Just kidding. It?s a term that maybe five people in the world use to describe, ?tendinitis, arthritis, tears and fractures.? In other words those stupid, spoiled, self-aggrandizing Baby Boomers are so focused on themselves that they?re actually trying to take medical conditions that already exist and house them under a giant umbrella that?s named after them. Fucking die already. That should be the rest of the trends. Trend 1: Baby Boomers take common words that everyone knows the definitions of and tries to change them to something that?s named after them. Trends 2-5: Baby boomers die. I like the way that sounds. [story]

?Could a sonic weapon make your head explode?? We can only hope. In the interim you could pick a blog entry of mine at random and try to read it. I think either my not drinking or my short temper might be responsible for a decrease in clarity in my writing. Maybe it?s just me?but I feel like nothing I type makes sense anymore. Maybe I?m losing my mind? Maybe someone unleashed a sonic weapon on me? Maybe my brain is about to explode? [story]

This week Live Science posed the question, ?Does anyone really believe in the Mayan apocalypse?? Well, I sure don?t. So I didn?t read the rest of the article. Can someone skim it for me and let me know if there really are any morons out there who believe this shit? [story] [Note: My dear friend Hornet Montana MIGHT believe in the Mayan apocalypse. If that's the case I can't say definitively that EVERYONE who believes in it is a moron. He's definitely not a moron. He just?believes in the Mayan apocalypse. We can't all be perfect.]

Today was the last long-run of my 4-month marathon training program. I run three more times before the race next weekend: Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Those runs are 3, 2, and then 2 miles each. Then I?m done. Then I rest up for Sunday. My 8-mile run this morning was finished in 1:03 and change, meaning I ran sub-8 minute miles the whole way. I feel good. I?m all smiles. I?m excited to see just how well I can do one week from tomorrow. Just like last year, I?ll write a wrap-up post detailing my training later this week. Then I?ll share some final thoughts this weekend (including my 2012 marathon mix that I?ll be listening to while I run) and a recap of the race on Monday the 3rd of December. Stay tuned.

Funeral Mist ? Anathema Maranatha [MP3]

Source: http://www.swanfungus.com/2012/11/on-webisodes-mars-the-mayan-apocalypse-baby-boomers-more.html?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=on-webisodes-mars-the-mayan-apocalypse-baby-boomers-more

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